True Miracle - by spinner
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It was almost twilight when Prince Dolgorukoi's carriage finally deposited Master and I at home on Malaya Nikitskaya Street. The warm, dusky night was spreading over the city, and the moon was glimmering like the faintest of hopes. The sleep had improved Danna's aura. His energy had strengthened. More sleep would be even better for him though.
We walked in step through the front gate and paused when a candle came to life beyond the window in Danna's study. No one should have been inside our home, let alone in the most sensitive room in the house. The Baron had completed the repairs necessitated by Le Viper's first attack on my master while Erast-san had been in the hospital suffering from the second, more personal attack. This strange candle could only mean trouble. Master wasn't taking any chances tonight. He reached behind his back for his weapon, and gave me a significant look. I immediately diverted around the house to the rear entrance. Master, however, went directly through the front door.
By the time I had made my way through the back of the house, through the kitchen, and into the foyer, the source of the mysterious light in the study had been revealed. Erast-san was standing in the study doorway, holding his derringer in his left hand. Damn woman, Countess Opraksina, was wrapped around him, her black-gloved arms like the tentacles of a dreadful sea serpent. Her black cloak and clothes matched his own perfectly. How did she manage to do this always?
Clearly she had let herself into the house in our absence, and not without purpose. She had brought a piano. A very large piano.
But why? And how?
My questions could wait for the time being. Countess Opraksina had both arms around my master, and she was nuzzling his nose with hers.
"I do apologize if I scared you," Addy murmured.
"I N-NEARLY SHOT YOU!" Erast-san screamed at her in a terrible fury.
"Hush, now. There's no need for dramatics," the cold countess soothed. Master's stiff body posture melted almost at once. "Put that gun away. Calm down. Sit. You look pale, my darling," she said, kissing his forehead and the tip of his nose.
Danna turned around to release her grip on him, and he bumped his knees on the piano bench. His eyes rode over the large wooden instrument as if he had just noticed it right then. Considering only one candle cut through the gray gloom, that might have been true.
"Why is there a p-p-iano in my study?" he asked in a quiet voice, tilting his head to one side like a puzzled child. His words made her smile a little. The countess was lighting more candles. Why she didn't flip on the electric switch, I wouldn't presume to guess.
"For your hand," Addy explained.
"How did you ever get it through the door?" he asked as the countess peeled off his cloak and frock coat and gave them to me.
"I have Chernomor in my pocket," she whispered in reply, taking his right hand and kissing it gently. She stared at me suddenly with those icy eyes of hers. "Some tea would be lovely, Masa, thank you."
That was an order, I realized. She wanted me to leave her alone with Danna. It was the last thing I wanted to do. He gave me an apologetic look that pleaded for my patience. I made my cheeks puff out broadly in imitation of a puffer-fish. A small twinkle of merriment glimmered for a second in his sad eyes. If I could improve his mood, I would fetch tea. I would even resist putting strong laxatives in the countess's cup. All I could hope was that she did not have Master completely naked before I could boil the water.
When I returned with the tray and cups and pot of tea as requested, Erast-san and the countess were sitting side by side on the bench before the large wooden instrument. I was not surprised that she was playing mother to him again. I was surprised he was fully clothed though. The countess had my master's fingers positioned on the black and white keys, and she dotted his fingertips with her own, pecking the keys slowly and mechanically. Erast-san winced as she moved his right hand and fingers. The countess noticed his pain at once and stopped. She gently cupped his hand in hers, bringing his fingers to her lips.
"Poor darling. You should have this wrapped and in a sling. It's obvious you're favoring it," she said, oblivious to the fact that the manner in which she was bending his fingers to kiss them was making tears well in his eyes.
I put the tray down on the desk and stood to my master's right side in order to be furthest away from the countess. Danna was watching Countess Opraksina with a tentative expression. I thought he might have been slightly amused, but it was hard to tell. He was masking himself well at the moment.
"Thank you, Masa. That will be all," Countess Addy said, giving me a baleful glare.
"Addy, be n-nice," Erast-san scolded softly.
"Would you mind if we could be alone?" she added to me.
I bowed dutifully, holding back my growls for another time. It wasn't every day that Master defended me against her, however meekly. I did not retreat very far from the study—only into the drawing room next door where I could listen to make sure she was not hurting Erast-san. His meager rest in the carriage was about to be wasted on her, I feared.
I closed the door tight and assumed a zazen position on the floor. It was possible to meditate and listen as well. Their words were interrupted and entangled with the soft tinkling of the piano keys. The countess was playing by herself this time. Part of me was pleased that she did not play well.
"You shouldn't overdo things, but work the keys a few minutes each evening, perhaps? I brought lots of different sheet music along. Some of it is very simple but it grows more complex—I knew you would be insulted otherwise. I do realize in the mornings you are at Masa's mercy with your exercises, but in the evenings, stretch your fingers, stretch your hands, just a little bit. It will make you feel better. I promise it will. It's not unlike your typing machine, really. My doctor prescribed the same for me—piano lessons—when I fell from the horse and broke my left wrist, do you remember?"
"Yes," Erast whispered emptily.
"It's not important that you learn to play well. You will, of course. There's nothing you can't do well. What's important is that you do not lose the movement in your hand and arm. Don't sit around sulking in the dark with the shades drawn. The piano will help. I promise. Will you at least try it?"
"Yes, Addy," he whispered again.
The music stopped. The countess was murmuring to my master.
"How tired you look tonight, dearest."
I could not hear Erast-san's reply. I did hear the tiny smacks of small kisses, and felt anger rise in my heart. Could she not leave him alone for once in her life? Wasn't it obvious to her how much pain he was in? He drew in a shaking breath, and the countess spoke again.
"I'm here if you need someone to talk to, darling."
I could not believe the tenderness I heard in her voice. Of course, she hadn't come all this way to be cross with him. Her uncharacteristic compassion surprised me though. Small kisses followed her words, and my master moaned miserably. I listened in amazement as more kind-hearted emotion spilled from her lips.
"You have nothing to feel guilty about. There must be a reason that you survived."
Fandorin-san managed one half of a quiet chuckle that died down into a choking noise. She must have reduced him to tears. Poor Danna. I knew he would be mortified at making such a display of his emotions, even to one so close to him. The usually-cold countess was being anything but wintry tonight.
"Shh. Shh."
I heard more kissing, and Master moaned again, not in misery, but in pleasure.
"Shh," the countess whispered. "My precious. My darling. Let me help you."
When I tiptoed into Master's bedroom the next morning, he was fully immersed in the ocean of covers, intertwined with the deadly sea serpent. Her fish-belly white skin glowed in the darkness. Her black hair was flowing around him like seaweed. He was lying on his side as if he had washed up on a distant shore, the victim of an unexpected drowning, entangled with the very weeds that had taken him under the waves.
But I should not speak ill of Countess Addy. I imagined I could even see a holy radiance about her in this dim light. The oft-wicked and self-serving countess had known precisely what to do with Master. It was all so clear to me. I had worried how I would get him back to sleep. But she had known exactly how to handle him. Last night's meditation in the drawing room had led me to believe that Buddha himself had sent her and her silly piano here to us yesterday to soothe the agony Master was feeling at the loss of his beloved Max. That was the only rational explanation. One could not question the perfection of the Buddha's logic with results such as this. Master had slept for the largest part of twelve hours. It was a true miracle.
As I stared at them in his bed, I wished that I could paint, or that I had time to borrow the photographic equipment from the police station. I so much wanted to capture this scene before me. It would have made a wonderful picture to torment Master with when he protested that he was not the sensual being I mistook him for. He liked to believe, at least to pretend, that he was above desire and carnality, maybe beyond the reach of lust and even mere physical sexual need. Time and again though, he proved himself wrong. Kirnov-san would have pointed this out to him, no doubt, with a wry and sarcastic tone. But now wasn't the time to gloat, nor to contemplate how a photograph of this scene would indeed go far in proving my case.
Mercilessly, I dragged my sleeping master from bed as the first glimpse of the sun was touching the horizon. With his malevolent blue eyes opened to dangerous slits, he mumbled under his breath about being disturbed, but he obeyed me. He headed for the bathroom to relieve himself and to brush his teeth. I waited until he had disappeared behind the closed door before I put the tray on the table—my humble offering for the sea serpent coiled in the ocean of covers.
I fled the bedroom and waited in the study, staring in bewilderment at the rather large piano the countess had brought. The deep brown, almost black wood gleamed with polish and smelled wonderful. Was the piano made of mahogany? It was as much a work of art as a musical instrument. There was beautifully-carved, dark wood folded down over the black and white keys. Small, golden, fleur-de-lis knobs protruded from the folded wood—these must be used to raise and lower the folded panel. The three pedals on the bottom of the instrument also formed an ornamental fleur-de-lis. It was an elegant and expensive gift, if a curious one.
It did create one dilemma though. There was no way Master and I were going to be able to move this monstrosity around in the mornings to exercise here in the study. I opened the door into the drawing room, and nodded to myself. It would have to do from here on out. The furniture was easier to move in the drawing room as it was. Sometimes the simplest solution is before us, if we only open our eyes.
Erast-san appeared first at the open study door, blinking sleepy eyes and tying the belt of his exercise robe. He stood at the piano, and a thin smile played with the side of his mouth. As he crossed between the desk and the piano, dodging the piano bench and his desk chair, he ran his fingertips over the dark wood. One of those chairs was going to have to go, or he would be constantly bumping his knees. Probably the piano bench could be replaced with a smaller seat. This would certainly discourage any more duets. Master turned that thin smile to serious concern when we came face to face at the door of the drawing room.
"I s-saw that tray. Omelet. B-brie. Wild truffles. Toast. Raspberry jam. Orange tea with honey. Addy's favorite breakfast, and one of her favorite roses."
"After danna exercises, I will feed him too," I promised as I went to move the tables around. He was hungry this morning. That was a wonderful sign indeed. He hadn't been talking about the food though. He had seen my offering for what it really was—a blatant attempt on my part to placate the emissary of Buddha should she rise in an inharmonious mood.
Master walked over to me, and I thought he was going to pick up the other side of the small table I was standing next to. Instead he walked around me, and he leaned his forehead down onto my shoulder from behind. He rested his hands around my thick middle and gave a contented sigh. He was not prone to overt displays of affection, and I greedily enjoyed this unusual oneness between us.
In my ear, he whispered in a velvet-gentle voice, "D-domo arigato, saiai harinezumi."
I touched the back of his bowed head with my fingers and smiled to myself, at least until I realized what he had said. What?! Beloved hedgehog?
After exercising him very strenuously, until he was pink and damp and panting for breath, I allowed Erast-san to disappear for a bath and fresh clothes. We were lucky that the countess chose to rise later than usual. I had time to exercise him twice, and he needed it very much. I would exercise him again later if possible, more slowly, and if time permitted, a massage could follow.
When I returned to the study with Master's breakfast in hand, the countess was sitting at the piano, her thin fingers spread out over the keys but making no music. She was mouthing and humming particular notes to herself, looking like a child learning them for the first time. She stopped abruptly when I came in.
"Erast is in the tub," she commented, rising to her feet and closing the carved, folded cover over the piano keys.
I put the tray on the desk and faced her as she drew on one of her long black gloves and straightened her hair. She was prepared already to leave? I think I surprised her when I knelt down and kissed the fingers of the glove that she had not yet pulled on. The sea serpent gave a tiny, uncomfortable laugh, tugging the velvet glove away from me and giving me an imperious frown. I rose up and backed away a safe distance.
"You're welcome," she murmured. After a small pause, I bowed from the middle. The gesture melted her reserve, and stiff words spilled forth. "Masa, you will look after Erast, won't you?"
"I will," I promised, bowing again.
"I've never seen him this melancholy before."
I bit my tongue to hold my reply. Did she not understand how close Kirnov-san and my master had become? Melancholy did not begin to describe what he was feeling! Her brief visit last month had seemed to indicate to me that she had wanted to put a stop to whatever closeness there was between Kirnov-san and Erast-san. Had I misunderstood that visit?
No, there could be no mistaking her intentions then. The countess was jealous of anyone who might divert Erast-san's attention from her, let alone his heart. She even thought of me as a rival for his attention and affection, not comprehending that what lay between my master and myself was not built merely on affection but also on sacred duty.
Perhaps the countess did not think that the connection between Kirnov-san and my master was one that could be considered equal and on the same level with her own that she shared with Erast-san. Was she looking to me for confirmation or denial? I did not wish to reveal the answers she might have been seeking. Therefore I held my tongue and averted my eyes, as if contemplating my master's woe with a mask of despair on my face.
"One cannot help but feel a sense of guilt and confusion when someone gives their life saving yours. It's bound to weigh heavy on anyone, but especially on Erastushka. He's a gentle soul, easy to wound. You can see that. You know him better than anyone else does, even me. He lets you in. You are the only one he truly trusts."
I remained silent, thinking that she knew him better than she realized, but again, I did not want to confirm this to her. She would only use that knowledge to increase her hold on Erast-san, and this I did not want.
"They were very good friends, Erast and Kirnov. He has a hard time making friends. This is going to turn him more inward than ever before. That's why he hides in here. You do realize? He's intimidated by having to interact with people. You have to look after him. Make sure he doesn't withdraw from us."
By 'us' she meant herself, of course.
"I will look after him," I promised again.
"Do not console me with meaningless, empty words. Erast must be distracted from his melancholy, or it will surely kill him. I saw him leaving the church yesterday. He was like a phantom. This simply won't do. I want you to take him by the collar, and find the most expensive, most experienced, most decadent woman you can lay your hands on, and make him stay in bed with her for a month."
"How strange. I decide on very same plan while making toast," I admitted. This was all the proof I needed that Buddha himself had sent her. She knew of my plan and approved of it!
"I have to go back to Petersburg. I don't have a choice. But I'm not leaving until you promise me you're going to look after Erast properly."
I went down on my knees before her and promised vociferously in Japanese that I would protect my master from all harm, that I would not let him dwell in darkness and misery and foul thoughts, that I would not let myself live if he did not rise out his melancholy, if only she would go away while I still had an inkling of appreciation for her. She did not understand more than two or three of the words that I spoke, but she was smiling grimly, nodding along as if she did understand me. I was lucky Master had never taught her Japanese.
Erast-san appeared at the study door while I was kneeling before the countess, spouting Japanese, kissing the top of her outstretched hand. The surprise of seeing us in cooperation nearly killed him on the spot. His inhalation of horror-shock-amusement alerted us to his presence, and we parted ways very quickly. He continued to blink his big, water-blue eyes at us.
"Erast? Why are you dressed for work?" the countess asked, sounding annoyed. She often did that—turned the balance of a situation to her own advantage when she had committed the first wrong.
"I need to….I sh-should….His Excellency will be exp-pecting me," Erast-san replied, very flustered.
"Duty, duty, duty. Erastushka, what am I going to do with you?" the countess clucked motherly impatience even while putting her arms around him and dotting orange-honey scented kisses on his cheeks and his brows. She straightened his collar and stroked his cheek. "How handsome you are in uniform," Addy purred, bringing a timid blush and a tiny smile to his face.
I was not surprised when Master angrily dismissed my plan to find him a courtesan. I had made the suggestion not two minutes after the countess had departed for the train station. She had left my master covered in moist, loud kisses, cooing at him in motherly tones. Even the droshky driver had looked away in embarrassment.
Danna ate his breakfast in silence, not finishing half the food I had brought him. He was sitting at his desk but started staring over one shoulder at the piano looming behind him. He wiped his fingers, dabbed his mouth, and then swiveled around in his chair to caress the carved wood that covered the keys.
"It was v-very sweet of Addy," Master commented sadly.
"How did she fit big beast through doorway?" I wondered aloud.
Master shrugged, shaking his head. He lifted the wooden cover out of the way, and touched the keys tentatively with his left hand, as if he were afraid the instrument would bite him.
"We should go for drive in park. Beautiful outside this morning," I suggested.
Making a serious frown, I carefully picked up his right hand, turned it over, and started to massage with my thumb along the center of the underside of his forearm. Perhaps if we went riding in the parks and gardens, Buddha would be merciful and put another distraction before Master's eyes. I would take him through the city's gardens and hope for an intrigue or crime or mystery to drop in our laps. Had anyone discovered Le Viper's body yet? That might cheer him up, to see the news splashed around the morning papers.
"Yes. We will require a c-carriage," Master agreed, wincing and frowning as I moved with careful pressure down into the middle of his palm. I touched a particular spot, and he yelped, pulling his hand from me and holding it against his chest. Erast-san turned back to his desk and started digging through one of the drawers on the left. He paused, glancing down into the drawer.
"Oh dear. We m-must have missed a hole while making patching the desk. I can see light," he whispered, opening and closing the drawer. "The Baron's men d-did a very fine job with the room though," he added, motioning towards the window that stared out onto the street. We needed to refit the room with personal touches, but it was nicely redone. At long last, there were new curtains on the window too!
I gathered the dishes, chewing up my last bite of bagel, and wondering what Danna was searching for in the drawer. Master located a small, black velvet bag, which he withdrew and held in his fingers. A sad expression was taking over his features again. The defensive wall built by last night's sensual pleasures would hold back his ocean of misery for only so long. If the ocean was not kept calm, it could develop into crashing waves of disaster! He held the black pouch between his hands and to his lips, mouthing words to himself.
"Where we going?" I asked, picking up his half-empty tray.
"To pray to Saint Valentine," he said, blinking quickly.
I had to strain to hear his words. Saint Valentine? This was not good. He wanted to go back to the church where he was shot at, where he had lost his beloved Max. He wanted to step on the wounds again. He wanted me to permit him to wallow in his pain. I must not allow this! I would never be able to clear my mind of how he looked when I first saw him at the hospital, drenched in Kirnov-san's blood. Master's wide, staring eyes did not register recognition of my face or anyone else's for many hours afterwards. It was too much like when he had lost Midori, when he had lain paralyzed with misery and gazing up at the sky.
Please, merciful and wise Buddha, you must send my master a different path to follow. Any path is better than the road that leads back to the Church of Saint Valentine.
The new telephone echoed loudly, and Danna cringed at the noise. He stretched out his right hand and picked up the receiver, holding it to his ear with his shoulder as he cradled his right hand close. He had barely completed his greeting when Prince Dolgorukoi started bellowing on the other end of the connection.
"Good m-morning, Your Excellency," Erast-san said, his thin mouth mimicking a polite smile. His brows rose and fell, and his eyes glimmered with curiosity for a moment or two. "No, not t-too early at all. You w-would? You have? We will be right there. Yes, sir."
He hung up the phone, and gave me a half smile. I put down the breakfast tray and waited for his explanation.
"P-prince Dolgorukoi has a new assignment for us. We must come at once, he says, immediately. Anisii is already there. I could hear him in the background, highly animated."
"Will Saint Valentine be patient and wait for your prayers?" I asked, taking his right hand and gently manipulating it. When he winced and tried to pull it back from me, I scowled at him and held tighter. He didn't want me to fix the hurt. He wanted to keep the hurt, so he could punish himself. That was why he had taken off the sling.
"We m-must hope so," Master whispered sadly. He lovingly caressed the velvet pouch and started to put it back in the drawer from which he had taken it. Instead though, he kissed the pouch and put it in his pocket closest to his heart.
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© 2008 to spinner
